Anyone who has ever frolicked in the ocean is wise to learn how to avoid getting knocked over by the waves. When a breaker threatens to inundate with its powerful churning energy, diving under it keeps you safe. Conversely, to passively stand in the path of this impending blow is likely to leave you feeling traumatized.
The imagery of the surf, with its potency and relentless momentum, is a fit metaphor for the slings and arrows that are unavoidable in life. Whether the ebb and flow of waves on a summer day, or the roiling ferocity of a Nor’easter, how do we find what we need to deal with inevitable challenges?
The definition of resilience is the ability to bounce back from trauma. Resilience is integral to mental health. Some would call resilience the definition of mental health. But resilience is not a fixed commodity. It can be lost as physical and mental challenges rise beyond a person’s accrued coping skills, and earned as people build coping skills that match the magnitude of challenge.
Without a guillotine, the mind and body cannot be pried apart. Any challenging circumstance is destined to have impact somewhere in the body. It is also most likely to be disorienting mentally in the form of emotional lability, cognitive confusion, behavioral missteps, interpersonal glitches and spiritual confusion. Resilience translates to awareness of the impact of life’s challenges to allow for self-care.
Since mind and body are a unit, mind/body techniques represent a way to dive under the turbulence of living. Consider these mind/body interventions:
- Accept your upset non-judgmentally.
- Accept that you feel out of control, also non-judgmentally.
- Accept that depression and anxiety are normal in challenging situations.
- Identify the place where stress “lands” in your body so you give it some TLC.
- Identify the mental experience of this stress.
- Decide with whom you can find relief from the stress.
- Identify productive distractions which can serve to break the spasm of mind/body stress.
- Become absorbed in creative projects for enjoyment.
- Avoid (to the degree that it is possible) those in whose presence you feel the worst.
- Assert your needs where necessary.
- Change what is troublesome that can be changed (a habit, a routine, a schedule).
- Do what is necessary to communicate effectively.
- Go where you feel most relaxed.
- Reach out for social support.
- Find a way to laugh.
- Play! Don’t postpone joy until the situation is resolved.
- Refuse to believe the negative thinking your mind will plague you with.
- Release emotions into a journal.
- Allow a catharsis. Tears are healthy!
- Discover the value of yoga, acupuncture, reiki, massage, meditation, hypnosis, guided imagery or prayer.
- Take a deep breath! The breath is a built-in tranquilizer.
Unlike waves in the ocean, you cannot necessarily predict when you’re about to be knocked over. It is imperative that you have an array of coping options, such as those above since what works one day will not necessarily work the next. Having appropriate interventions to select from so you can pull yourself out of a ‘funk’, is the route to supporting yourself with resilience.
Helen Adrienne 212-758-0125|, helen@helenadrienne.com
Copyright@Helen Adrienne 2025
